This blog is a series of snapshots, taken at any one point in time. Like a photograph, it freezes thoughts, memories, and a huge amount of randomness onto this page. For example, this entry, will contain nothing that I forgot yesterday, nor does it have any room for what I’ll learn tomorrow.

What I am trying to say is, sometimes, just sometimes, what I’ve written is not only “insane” as my thoughtful brother described it, but also complete and total rubbish. So, sometimes the facts are a little skewed.

I think the best example of this so far, is the legend of Aphrodite. But let’s face it, I knew it at the time too, right? So, long overdue, are the corrections. With a little more recent research

So there’s the daddy god of all god’s. I don’t think that’s Zeus, he’s just the leader, head of the superhero’s. And there’s the mummy god. She’s pretty important too.

There are actually two different versions of the story of Aphrodite’s birth. One of them by Homer (Iliad, Book V, 370), she’s the daughter of Zeus and Dione (Dione is just the name that is merely the feminine form of Zeus in Greek). That one’s not very interesting though, and doesn’t involve the rocks in Cyprus at all, so we’re going to go with the other one for now.

That’s the one by Hesiod (Theogony, 188-198) and resembles my vague recollection. So the father was Ouranos (Uranus). He’s still the father of the Gods.

They have loads of baby gods, and the youngest of them (he’s one of the evil ones in the Age of Mythology, Hades, or one of them), walks in on mummy and daddy god having sex. He’s a bit annoyed, so takes the harsh action of cutting off his dads testicles, and throwing them down to earth.

The youngest of the gods, is the Titan Kronos. I sort of remembered that, when we were driving back from Nicosia, and the tour guide pointed out a mountain that was named after him. I was right though, Kronos is an evil god in Age of Mythology. Thank you Microsoft.

Couldn’t find any reference to him walking in on his mum and dad, but he obviously didn’t like his dad very much either way - as he did cut off his genitals, and cast them into the sea.

Well, they land on earth, but daddy god’s a bit fertile, and impregnates Mother Earth, or nature. And then, presumably 9 months go by, and voilà (our tour guide said voilà a LOT), Aphrodite emerges from this rock on the Cyprus coastline.

There wasn’t exactly your standard 9 months involved in this birth. From the foam that gathered around Oranous’ genitals, Aphrodite emerged fully formed. In some ways, the story is a lot more analogous to one of those sponges you can get; you throw it in water, and you get a bigger sponge, or a flannel.

Personally I much prefer Hesiod’s, and I’m not alone. It supports the Aphrodite, Goddess of fertility idea. She has also been depicted by a number of artists as Anadyomene (meaning “She who emerges”).

Now that that’s cleared up - I’ll tell you the even more exciting news, that the HR department managed to come up with 5 days more holiday for me to use before the end of the year! so now I have a grand total of three weeks off in December, or something stupid like that. Two at the start, and one at the end after Christmas. So I have the travel itch again. I’m not sure exactly what I’m going to do with those two weeks yet, but I welcome any ideas you want to offer in the comments. Mimi from work has already suggested sorting the books in her basement and painting some rooms in her house. So you don’t have to go very far to top it

I’m hoping for something more along the lines of “Oh look, you can spend 10 days in Peru for only 100 pounds around that time of year”. But I don’t think I’m that lucky

I was very impressed when I saw the fantastic Google Maps integration for Gallery 2.

But, not being satisfied with Gallery v2, I still have version 1 installed for Blakepics - so the module can’t be installed So, I decided to write my own:
www.blakepics.com/map/index.php

You can either link to specific countries I’ve visited, by linking like this:
www.blakepics.com/map/index.php?country=Cyprus

I’ve been meaning to try out the Google API for ages now, but never really had anything I wanted to implement that hadn’t been done already. So, admittedly this has been done already too - but not in a way I could use. So I’m very pleased with the results

You can find the link to the map on Blakepics, and on the right hand panel of the blog homepage.

Feeling a little shocked that my ostrich eggs post was so high on Google and fueled with a huge sense of vanity, I decided to search for my name on Google’s Blog Search, too.

I found myself already quoted on MaltaMedia. And I thought to myself, “that’s pretty cool”.

I’m back in England. Safe and sound. I arrived back at my flat around 1pm today, quite a few hours after i should have. Since my last entry, I managed to bore myself stupid at Larnaca airport Luckily, I was among good company. The small toddler who was stealing things from duty free (just sweets, not cigarettes or anything - small time stuff) was cute to start with, but as the minutes ticked by like hours, and as he got more restless, so did I. Imagine my joy at finding him just a few seats away on the plane. With the crying and the screaming.

So, a flight delayed for three and a half hours with no explanation; an aborted boarding at the gate (due to technical difficulties); the plane unable to taxi to the runway, because of a broken luggage lift attached to the plane; a rather rough flight and landing; and having only slept about 2 hours in the last 40. I don’t feel my best

But, I am proud that I managed to stay awake all day long (take that, jetlag). I’m also pleased at having bought another two bottles of Bailey’s, at the request of Nick - bringing the grand total to four, at least until I give some away. And I’ve put a ton of pictures online at www.blakepics.com/cyprus.

If you don’t feel like clicking through all of them and I don’t blame you. Then the Cyprus Video Story is probably more for you. Because that has most of the best pictures in it anyway. The music, is Howie Day - Collide, which is also the tune that the name of this blog comes from. Which is kinda appropriate, since this holiday has kind of launched my blog

I’ll finish up tonight, as I’m sure I’ll be continuing to do for quite a while yet, with correcting the outrageous lies I wrote while on holiday - pieced together from scraps of memory from very informative tour guides, but sadly mashed together by my brain. Ostrich eggs, in the Cyprus Orthodox Churches. Well, after a quick google search, I found a load of very unhelpful answers and pages, this very same blog being one of them. So I feel a certain responsibility to make sure the question is of the eggs is answered properly. I’m sure you’re all dying to know anyway

Well eventually, I found this:

OSTRICH EGGS
* It is hanged before the iconostasis.
* It reminds us of the resurrection where small ostrich break out of the egg. Besides the point that the ostrich eyes are always fixed on its eggs during the incubation period.

Source: http://www.copticchurch.net/topics/thecopticchurch/dictionr.pdf

Ignoring the poor use of “hanged”, this is exactly what I’m after. The iconostasis, is what all of the icons are displayed upon. It’s the same screen that seperates the alter from the main chapel. So, the use of the ostrich egg, is identifiable with the use of the egg at Easter time, resurrection, rebirth and all of that stuff. It also symbolises the soul. The worshippers are the watchful ostriches, watching over their souls on display at the front of the church, and keeping in mind the importance of the gift of life that God has bestowed.

If you google it yourself, you’ll find tons of references to ostrich eggs throughout religion, and various different ceremonies. But I don’t care about them - for me the question of the ostrich eggs is now answered, and I for one, can sleep easier …

Personally I think it was more likely that a young monk, just out of monk training, was tasked with decorating a remote church somewhere. The archbishop would have walked through to bless all of the work he’d done. “I like what you’ve done with the fingerpaints, Timothy. What’s the deal with the eggs?”. “Well, your excellency, I found some eggs out the back, and I thought….you know what would look cool?”.

At this point, the young monk’s mentor would jump in and seize an opportunity for an appraisal by the archbishop. “What Timothy is trying to say is, the eggs are our very souls, our essence. If we do no remind followers of the faith about what God has provided for us, then we are nothing”. And he’d get the gold star from the archbishop. While Timothy would have to go and wash his hands.

Something like that, anyway.

So, I arrive at Larnaka airport, 2.30 - right on time. Feeling rather sleepy, and ready to get on the plane … And as I’m staring up at the board, I can’t see my flight anywhere.

I pull my ticket out of my bag, and double check the flight number. I look back at the screen - oh there it is, under “new time”. Oh yes, my flight has been delayed by 3 hours for some unknown reason, and will now be leaving at 7.45, instead of 4.30. I wish I was in bed
Now, about 5 hours ago, I was sitting down to dinner with a very nice Welsh man, in the restaurant downstairs at the hotel. “You have to get here at 7, you see”, he says in a very thick welsh accent, “that’s when they open the restaurant, and it gets rather busy after that”. We get onto the subject of flights, and finally I find someone who’s leaving (though not today) at stupid o’clock in the morning. “I was speaking to a couple the other day in the bar here. They were telling me that their flight was delayed by 3 hours” he said, “I’ve been coming here for 10 years now, I’ve never had a delay yet”. “Don’t say that” I replied, “you’re really just digging the knife in an twisting it round, aren’t you?”. He laughed. I swear he jinxed my flight.

Well now I know, Mr Welsh Man. You come back to the Ari Nosa, or whatever that hotel just next door is called. And you do it every May, and every October. So you better watch out in May. Because I’m going to be the one standing at the end of the runway, running towards the plane, screaming “you can’t leave yet!!”

Yes, my flight is delayed. And anyone wondering if I’m back yet who hasn’t checked the flight timetables. I’ll be back around 10.30. Ho hum. Just 5 more hours to kill in Larnaca airport Mind you, the GPRS wasn’t playing nicely earlier, so posting a warning here probably won’t be very useful if I can’t post it until I get back
At least they were kind enough to provide me with one of those free sandwich and “refreshments” vouchers. Bastards.